Saturday 23 October 2010

The Perfect Man

I've been following some right funny bloggers on twitter for a while (@WorldofSheds, @Sherby57 and @NotlikeParis... you should follow them right now if you're not already... really, don't bother reading anymore of this pish... go back to twitter and follow them immediately!) They make me lol on a regular basis with surreal strafings from their Roflcopters.

Anyway, they've been having some kind of 'blog off' and are all blogging away on the subject of 'The Perfect Man'... I've been invited by the wonderful WorldofSheds, (AKA, Dr Angel), to humiliate myself publicly and have a go.

This is that go.

So... my perfect man is Tony Francis. A made up person consisting of two real people. Those people being Tony Benn and Black Francis. I realise that this really isn't what they mean but it's all I've got.


When I was 13 I used to go and stay with my gran once a week. She had been battling breast cancer for a year or so, and as my Papa had a part time job as a night watchman in a local hotel, I would go over on a Thursday night just in case she needed someone through the night.

These Thursday night's were magical. I'd arrive about 7pm and settle down in the living room and watch Top of the Pops, Tomorrow's World and The Young Ones while my gran stayed in her bed reading big thick impressive hardback books, eating garlic sausage sandwiches and drinking ridiculous amounts of Roses lime cordial.

Once all the news programs had finished I'd set up the 14 tonne zed bed for myself then put some sheets and blankets down for my gran on the couch and get her through for Question Time. In 1983, Tony Benn seemed to be on Question Time every other week and this suited my gran just fine cos she was in love with him!

We would both watch with absolute hero worship as he'd tear into whichever snooty tory happened to be on the panel that week. He would turn any difficult question asked of him into a blistering attack on his right wing rivals and receive such a rapturous applause from the studio audience as to make my gran and I join in.

All through my life he's been there fighting for society's downtrodden and poor. When he made this appeal (http://tinyurl.com/bmybbw) on BBC News a couple of years back I donated immediately. An absolutely brilliant orator and a man of principle and decency. I will cry when he goes.

Black Francis probably shouldn't be included here as he is more of a god.

Those unbelievable songs have soundtracked my adult life. The noise, the screaming, the quiet bits... If you've ever had a really really bad day, get in your car, put a pixies track on (may I recommend 'Tame' if it's been a particularly pissy day) turn it up loud and scream along at full volume. 

You. will. feel. better.